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Transcosmic Interdimensional Travel Services (TITS) is proud to present Exotic ExoTech’s fully automated luxury transpatial transpecial transtemporal transpersonal transformative informative technologically exogenous endogenously erogenous ontologically ambiguous new metatranstech experience: The Portal Puddle!  

Ever wonder who you were in a past life?  Do you suspect that you were once far more important and interesting than you are now? Are you curious about the genesis of your various fears, triggers and kinks?  Take a tour of your previous incarnations! Gain useful insights and get rid of your delusions.  

What if you had not made such bad choices?  Are you pining for the one who got away? How would your life have been different if you’d had the courage, wit, and luck to fulfill your wildest dreams? Somewhere in the multiverse, it’s all happening. Live your best life! (And if you’re strong enough, take over, and send your smug and unsuspecting alternate back to face failure in your place!)  

They say that karma is a bitch, and you sure know what you have coming!  The future .001%ers live immortal lives immersed in inconceivable abundance on off-world colonies, while the vast majority of humanity is left behind in a dystopian hellscape. The odds are low that that you will be one of the elite. But what if you could stack the deck? Get early dibs on a gilded womb, and write the story of the you you want to be!